Nothing much happens on a Monday night. Blankie and I were tucked up on the sofa trying to figure out what the hell is happening in ‘Lost’ (theories welcome), when my phone rang. Normally I wouldn’t answer after 10 but I was curious about the number.

“I know you won’t remember me, but we have met� random bloke.

“Right……where did we meet� me

“At a party in Swords� random bloke.

“I haven’t been there in over 2 years ago, since my friends moved house� me

“Well actually it’s 3 years� random bloke

“You’re ringing me up after 3 years – don’t you think that you’re playing the hard to get thing a bit too seriously?� – me

Random but enjoyable conversation ensued. Apparently he is changing jobs and was moving and deleting numbers from one phone to another, came across mine and decided to give me a call and see if I wanted to meet up. Now one part of me thinks that it is a bit cheeky, but can anyone spending their evening Lost with a Blankie afford to be picky?

Most people hate January as it is such a depressing month, but as a single person it provides a myriad of opportunities. At Christmas and New Year most single people lose their identity, if you’re not part of a couple or bouncing a baby on your lap you don’t exist. Consequently in January thoughts turn to finding a partner – even boy thoughts (they are distraught at the lack of attention over the festive season and decide it is finally time for a substitute ‘Mammy’).

So how do you nab yourself one of these prime candidates?

Option 1 – Going Out
Get your ass into town but aim for the old man pubs and sit at the bar. (advice on what to do here ). Most of the blokes out and about in January tend to be single, social and have disposable income. Even better very few women head out as they are broke from shopping in the sales.

Option 2 – Online
Internet dating accounts for 6% of couples. The two big options in Ireland are www.anotherfriend.com which seems to have the most people, but they have just overhauled their site and the new UE (User Experience) is complete pants. The other is www.maybefriends.com, which doesn’t have the quantity or quality but the guys seem to be a lot more serious about dating. Avoid all “free� dating sites – you get what you pay for! ( more info here )

I realise there are lots of other options but I can’t give away all my secrets, how the hell will I find a man !

I met a random bloke at the bar when I was out last night. His aftershave was very unusual, not bad unusual just unusual - it smelt a bit like church incense. As I had a few drinks on me I decided to share this fact with him.

“Your aftershave is really unusual, it smells like church incense� me

“Yea, it’s called Eau d’Priest� - him

“Really, I’ve never heard of it before� - me suppressing a grin

“Oh, it’s pretty popular in religious circles. Haven’t you heard the tag line, “Eau d‘Priest - for the man who works miracles� – him

“Definitely a new one on me, so does it work miracles then?� - me

“Well that depends do you feel like kneeling down in front of me� – him winking

Potentially this is one of those ‘you had to be there’ stories but it was particularly funny at the time. Unsurprisingly he has a girlfriend.

PS - the aftershave was Gucci Envy.

It was a pretty standard night out before Christmas, town smelt of burnt steak and desperate women; Keoghs was full of drunk men - none good looking, Cafe was full of drunk men - none Irish and the Horseshoe was full of drunk men - none single, although a few seemed to think they were.

I was about to give up my explorations when Lady M convinced me to have one for the road in ‘Samsara’. Not one of my favourite places as no matter where you stand you are in a walk way, so the whole pub becomes human bumping cars. Alcohol is ordered on the ability to drink without spilling. Just as well Cosmopolitans are now passe. On my way back from the bar having successfully swerved most people I crashed into a rather large lad…

Although my drink remained intact his didn’t and it rained down on top my recently blow dryed hair. Before I had a chance to engage Rant Drive – Warp Speed, he pulled off his top and started drying me off. Hard to say which I was more shocked by, his response or his biceps. He wasn’t overly good looking, but by God was he built and not in a manufactured gym way.

I eventually managed to convince him that I was fine and he could reclaim his shirt. Not like me to encourage a man to put on clothes but women people were starting to drool stare. Bicep Boy insisted on buying me a drink, but as I could feel my hair starting to frizz and Lady M was waiting we settled on another time and swapped numbers – result. Turns out he is a carpenter, hence the arms, and as I met him before Christmas it seems logical to call him Joseph.

Shortly after I left the pub, thinking that was the end of my excitement for the night, but as is often the case I was wrong. Another surprise was waiting for me at home………….